The action for introverts to even out the extrovert competition

It's 3PM on a Thursday afternoon and I'm feeling very frustrated. I've been sitting in my seat for the last 25 minutes in the "Leaders Summit", where our C-level Executive, her 6 direct reports, and each of their direct reports (of which I am one of 30) got together after our recent traumatic restructure, to supposedly regroup as a team, form new bonds, and find a new way forward. We'll also have one of those "not mandatory but strongly encouraged" bonding dinners at the end of the day.  We're on the conference room floor of our office building. It's an amazing space of endless conference rooms, where glass dividers can be stowed away to form one massive conference room. Each room is surrounded by glass and our building has an unobstructed view of the river, city center, and the freeway. It was a gorgeous day outside and we can even see the storm brewing in the distance.

The Summit was designed to make me feel like I am an equal and valued member of the leadership team that can shape the direction of the entire business unit and help the organisation of 15,000 employees make better decisions (i.e. smarter risk taking). You can probably tell by now, I am not buying it. Partly because it was so rushed (there wasn't even an agenda), it was only two weeks after our major restructure (where we had to take drastic action to fight injustice) and the survivors were still feeling raw, and partly because those that have been made redundant were also invited, some of whom even attended though clearly weren't interested in setting the direction. Their invite was likely an oversight on the organizer's part.

But what really made it worse, was that those who were not impacted, or in my view, unfairly got a promotion through the whole restructure, were happy and gloating. They didn't even attempt to pretend to empathize with the others in the room, adopting their new promoted titles in presentations, even though the new structure doesn't take effect for a few more weeks. They clearly bonded with each other and were part of the in-crowd with the C-level Executive's direct report.

The one who most openly displayed a complete lack of EQ was the man who organized the Summit. We shall call him "Mr Snooty". Over the last 18 months, he has overly positioned himself as the C-Suite Executive's right hand man, squirreling information from each of us, and feeding it upwards as if it were his own. Despite not delivering the one major project that was directly in his portfolio, and making several mistakes (including inviting leaders who have been made redundant to the Summit) he has become the trusted adviser. So much so, that he was given the task of leading the restructure. Yes, you read that right. The man who was in charge of the restructure, managed to restructure himself into a promotion. Although I'm not surprised, the injustice is hard to ignore. I've been in similar positions in the past, where I've had to terminate peers, but at no stage did I even think about exploiting the situation to find myself a promotion. That's the introvert people pleaser at work.

So as I was feeling more and more frustrated, I tried to come up with ways to distract myself from the rubbish content HR was spewing out about "job families", "capability frameworks", and "managing yourself through change". Of course, given so close to the restructure, nothing has been completed and all the HR guy could give us was some high level view of what each key initiative hoped to achieve. Then, Mr Snooty spoke up. His voice is always so high pitched, I secretly think his balls have never dropped. When he speaks, he has an added air of arrogance, one of those who always looks down his nose at you, and gesticulating wildly. 

Since my brain had already shut down, I thought, let's do something interesting. Let's observe Mr Snooty and see what is it about him (other than my own personal biases) that has made him so successful. What is it about him, that makes him such a trusted adviser. He didn't get there by luck so there must be something he does. I was struggling to keep track of my observations so I decided to write down what I observed and what he did or said. It was the HR guy's presentation so why Mr Snooty would say anything at all is beyond me, but he did. And a lot. You know when the presenter is about to finish a section and asks for any questions before he/she moves onto the next section, there's always that one person who has to say something. Mr Snooty is that person.

As the HR guy droned on, I started to look over my written observations. And that's when it hit me. I thought I had it wrong, so I read through my observations again. I wasn't wrong. Then Mr Snooty started talking again, so I wrote down what he said and it confirmed my observation: 

MR SNOOTY WASN'T SAYING ANYTHING AT ALL. HE WAS JUST TALKING!!!!!!

That's right, when I read back the words that he said out loud, I realized that he wasn't saying anything at all. Not a single sentence he uttered was of any value. Here are some verbatim examples:

• Just after the HR guy finished saying that the capability framework was still in progress, Mr Snooty said this to the Summit audience "It's something we need to get right. It forms the foundations for our success and leveraging the abilities in this room." Think about it. What a useless and obvious statement. It's so basic that most of us don't even think about saying it. Yet out it comes from Mr Snooty in a manner as if he's just uttered the most philosophical statement ever.
• Just after the C-Suite Executive finished presenting the high level summary of our strategy and investment needed in systems, Mr Snooty said this to the Summit audience "We need to really get this right and improve our systems. It's our ticket to play." Again, it's such a useless statement, full of hot air.

Then I started to recall all the meetings that I've been in with Mr Snooty and I realized that he does exactly the same thing. After somebody has made a point, he utters a completely useless statement, either just repeating the same but with more words or sentences that are just hot air. I've hit on one of his tricks. Just say something so that you'll be heard and noticed. It doesn't matter what you say (though a level of alignment with the topic is recommended), the fact that you said something makes you stand out. Why? Because nobody else is saying anything.  

So it hit me. Introverts are more intelligent than extroverts (I'm generalizing here). But introverts, particularly shy introverts don't like to draw attention to themselves. Therefore we don't speak up (even when we have something to say). We wait until we have an absolutely cracker of a point. But by then, either we're so nervous, we struggle to get the point across clearly, or we wait for our turn and the moment has passed. But to progress in your career, you have to get noticed. A few well thought through insightful points, is not enough to compete with a constant barrage of hot air when it comes to garnering attention and staying front of mind of important people. When combined with introvert's nature to avoid socializing, we're at a definite and distinct disadvantage for career progression. 

So here it is. Don't worry too much about always having to have a deep insightful point before saying something. Aim to speak more often in meetings or in front of important people. Even if you think the point is just a reiteration of someone else's point or is just so obvious. In fact, we should definitely say it if it's obvious, because there's no risk. Nobody is going to disagree with you. It's just one more action we can take to potentially even out the playing field. 

Blog Photo by Climate KIC on Unsplash.